Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize