yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The best revenge is premature balding
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
