I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
