i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
