What a fucking waste of an outfit
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
