if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
