is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
