google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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