The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
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