there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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