I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I wish i was in the wii world.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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