Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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