it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize