Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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