belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
