Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
