i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Are we still banned from the library?
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
