Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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