We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize