Only a mothe r could love this liver
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
