well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
