using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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