Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize