He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize