Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
