Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Randomize
