Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
