I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
