somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
