Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
