Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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