We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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