honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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