what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
