is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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