i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
