Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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