Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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