this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
