Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
