i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
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