What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
