Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize