HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
