There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
