Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
