Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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