Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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