In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Randomize
