Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
