What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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