love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
wanna go halves on a baby?
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
