You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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