OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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