found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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